Thursday, July 1, 2010

I Love Being a Dad!

One of the greatest adventures in my life is the fact that Timothy, Zachery, Benjamin and Hannah call me Daddy. They bring me great joy! So, what’s so exciting about being a dad?

Well, it comes down to a verse of scripture that motivates and encourages me, here it is, “Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons (and daughters) born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.” Children are a blessing. Now let’s not kid ourselves …they don’t always feel like a blessing. Yet, I delight in the fact that through our four ‘arrows’ my wife Stacy and I can extend our reach far into the future.

According to this passage, I am a warrior. It’s my job to make sure my arrows are straight, sharp and true. An arrow that stays in the quiver is merely an ornament. Arrows are meant to be released they should fly straight, hit their targets and accomplish their mission. So, together with Stacy, I have a great responsibility to fashion arrows that will be released at the appropriate time, fly straight, reach a destination and accomplish a mission. This is where the excitement begins!

As a dad, I want to teach them things. They should know how to explore new places, solve problems, defend a position, make decisions, engage others, be polite, find their way and discern right from wrong. Obviously this list isn’t complete but you get the picture. The big challenge then becomes, how do we teach these things and have fun? Here are just a few of the ideas we’ve employed…

We encourage our kids to try. Within safe but broad boundaries, children need to experiment and see what life feels like. We love to watch our kids try new stunts on the playground, attempt a new sport, learn a new skill or create a new game.

Zachery loves to climb and he loves gadgets. I came home one day to find him and Benjamin trying to climb a tree in a homemade harness that consisted of a pair of old underwear, suspenders, a bicycle inner tube and a rope. It was quite a sight! It’s only through experiments like this that children learn, not every idea is a good one. They solve problems, modify designs, improve performance and find better solutions.

We expect our kids to succeed… and fail. Regardless of what our kids attempt, we want them to do their best. We cheer like crazy whenever we have the chance and talk about lessons learned from success. But we also recognize that some of the most important lessons are learned from losing. So, we cheer for their efforts and help them understand the lessons they learn from coming in second, or last.

Timothy is a miler on his track team. He does very well but, because there’s an exceptional athlete in his grade, the best he’s ever done is second. He’s learned many lessons about courage, determination and confidence by continuing to push, not for a win but for a respectable finish.

We want our children to understand that there are absolute standards of right and wrong. With that in mind, Stacy and I know that sometimes our children will do the wrong thing. Our kids aren’t perfect, neither are we. So, our desire and our prayer is that our children will do the right thing most of the time. We also desire and pray that when they do wrong, they will be caught and severely punished.

Recently, Hannah did something wrong and was punished. Her tender heart was broken when she confessed it to me. It was a blessed moment to hold her while she cried and understood that she had done wrong. I hope she never forgets how bad that feels.

I’m not a perfect dad. I make lots of mistakes. But I do delight in watching our children experiment with life and learn lessons that will serve them well when they are launched out into life. We continue to pray that lessons learned in our home and the cheers they’ve heard along the way will prepare our arrows to fly straight, hit a target and accomplish a mission! I’ll always delight in listening to their stories and cheering for them. That’s what Dads do.

Mike Young is a husband and father as well as the Director of Noble Warriors men’s ministry. He lives in Chesterfield County. Email him at mike.young@noblewarriors.org.

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